From The Heart
by o.OchantelO.o
Summary: Sam decides to go off script at an important moment in life.


I'm back! I know it's been a while, but, I was hoping we could pick up where we left off? lol  
I just wrote this today, aaaand it has not been beta'd. Heads up.

Standard disclaimer: I do no own Popular in any right, this is all non-profit creative writing.

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The sky loomed an overcast shadow across the grass, leaving it looking grey. There was silence, and there was electricity in the air as people piled out of cars and into parallel lines behind each other. The soil was wet from rain and soft moisture covered each blade of grass, along with the seats of the plastic chairs that sat upon them. A casket perched on the top of a six-foot hole, staggering each person who arrived. It was the kind of day most people would strike from their memory out of necessity, but Sam was using all of her energy to burn it into her mind.

When it was her turn to speak, she dried her eyes, and slowly walked to the podium in front of her. She let her fingers graze the coffin slightly as she passed, hoping to feel the familiar warmth of a hand, but leaving with the cool chill of wood instead. She ducked her head and swallowed hard. Sighing, she began.

"It's dark out today." She was met with an overwhelming quiet.

"That's wasn't supposed to be part of my speech, but, when I look at the sky I can't help but think that maybe I should let you know.

It's dark today, the weather is bad.

It's windy, and rainy.. and damp.

I can smell the earth without trying, and,.. and I feel like if I strain enough.. maybe I'll be able to smell you again. I mean, without sneaking into your closet and finding one of your oversized sweaters." She finished with a small chuckle, clenching her speech in her hands. She had yet to raise her eyes to her audience.

"I had this whole piece of paper filled out with things that I was going to say about you. Stories about how you taught me that standing up for myself was about more than just knowing how to use my own legs.. I remember when you showed me how to ride my bike. I was so scared, and, you looked at me and told me 'Sam, falling off is the most important part'

I don't think I really understood what you meant then..

'You're going to fall' you told me. I was so mad at you for not believing in me"

Sam paused in reflection, glancing up for the first time. She found her voice and continued one.

'"You need to learn how to fall, before you can know how to get back up"

I know what you meant now.

They say that you never really lose a person all at once.

That it takes time before everything that they were really disappears.

You will never disappear to me.

I won't let you.

Which is why I'm not going to read from this piece of paper today. Because you were a good man, and everyone who knew you knows how good of a man you were. You were kind and compassionate. And you did everything with as much as you could give. Even when you were so sick that you couldn't stand, you never gave up"

The wind whisked around Sam's hair and she could hear her mother crying.

"You fell Dad..

You fell so down hard that I all I wanted, for the longest time, was to meet you on the pavement.

It wasn't until I walked up to this podium that I realized by living like that.. that I was shaming you and turning my back on everything you taught me."

She took a deep breath, exhaling audibly and swallowing hard.

"So I'm going to get up. I'm going to hurt, and miss you, and remember you every day.

But I'm going to stand," she paused "because I know how to get back up"

Sam's lip trembled and a tear slid down her cheek, and she forced a smile.

"You were the best Dad that anyone could have asked for.

I'm lucky and proud to be your daughter.

I'm going to be the best person that I can be. And I'm going to be that person because of you."

Tears were streaming down her face but for the first time since hearing of her father's death, Sam felt the chaos inside of her subside. She spoke her final words with strength, determination and absolute truth.

"You are my hero, Dad.

I will never forget you"

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So that's it guys! I'd really appreciate some feedback on this one. I've also started another chapter of Sunsets and Car Crashes. I'm revising te second one. Hit the feedback button!


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